It’s been a while, but I am back.

I won’t sugarcoat it or be evasive: The last several months have been arduous as I sailed into unfamiliar territory and grappled with lingering physical and mental health challenges, as well as the struggle to find resolution, all the while trying to muster enough energy to follow my bliss, even if it’s only one (small) step at a time.

Another hurdle I have overcome is writer’s block. As any writer knows, feeling uninspired to write is maddening, especially when your primary goal and desire is to be a writer. I also haven’t kept up on my reading, despite having many books on my shelf waiting to be explored. If you’re a writer struggling with writer’s block, reading is an excellent way to overcome it. Even watching a well-written movie or series can spark inspiration.

Some things are beyond my control. The world feels very heavy and dark right now. If you sense it, too, it’s not your imagination. I struggle to scroll through newsfeeds without becoming consumed by worry and heartache, no matter how often I remind myself that worry is wasteful and doesn’t influence outcomes. We don’t know what the future holds for humanity. I find it hard to ignore images and stories of needless pain and suffering, but for the sake of self-preservation, it is something I must do.

The last several months haven’t been a complete ice cream cone in the dirt. There have been plenty of small wins to celebrate, and there are always reasons to be grateful. Facing challenging times still allows for learning and growth.

“To anybody who thinks being self-employed means you don’t have to work for a boss you hate, I have terrible news.”

Jonathan Edward Durham, author

The Solo Hustle

When I first established my small business, I felt motivated and excited, but soon felt overwhelmed by the realities of sole proprietorship. By late fall of 2024, grappling with doubts (on top of the nagging health problems), I questioned if self-employment was right for me. When I found a local company looking for an executive assistant, I applied. The job offered perks like proximity to home and balanced demands, allowing me to continue building my virtual assistance business and focus on my writing. If self-employment wasn’t in my future, I could at least contribute to someone else’s small business without the stress of my next paycheque looming overhead.

Unfortunately, the opportunity fell through after a month, and I was back to the drawing board. I felt disappointed when it didn’t work out, but I reflected on whether this was a sign to refocus my efforts. Since then, I’ve limited the time I spend doom-scrolling through job search engines and redirected that energy into brainstorming ways to market my services and submit my writing.

There are a few things that helped me navigate my journey and manage my work expectations:

Connecting with a supportive friend, mentor, or networking group—or all three, if needed. There is no such thing as too much support when flying solo. My close friend and fellow virtual assistant and I walk to the local café once a week. Over our favourite brewed beverages, we exchange nuggets of wisdom and discuss our current setbacks. Another close friend who runs a small business is also my mentor, and we enjoy long walks together, discussing business ideas and personal growth. Through social media, I have joined online communities for women entrepreneurs and virtual assistants to expand my network.

Understanding that a return to full-time work to meet my financial needs isn’t a failure, provided I set clear expectations for a healthy work environment and work-life balance. The old me gave a lot for very little in return, and I suffered greatly, even losing touch with myself. The shift to hybrid and remote work has helped me achieve a better balance, and my former two-hour daily commute, which drained my time, finances, and energy, is no longer a viable option for me. My safety is also a significant concern due to rising violence on public transit in my city.

I feel well prepared to continue my ventures into self-employment, knowing that it won’t be a cakewalk. What matters most is not quitting before I fully commit myself.

“Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.”

George Bernard Shaw, writer

Creating Yourself

“Who am I?” This is a question that I believe everyone should ask themselves during a time of metamorphosis. Understanding our identity guides our actions toward becoming the person we aspire to be.

Until recently, I had only known one side of my family. I always felt that part of me was unwritten. I have an amateur passion for science, and thanks to the incredible molecule known as deoxyribonucleic acid (DNA), I found my paternal family side. Connecting with my biological father has been a life-changing experience for both of us. In tracing the lines of my father’s story, I discovered the contours of my own. For anyone who is naturally curious about long-lost family or ancestry, the experience of uncovering these details can be both fascinating and transformative. It is incredible to see the pages of people from around the globe with whom I have a genetic connection, proving that we are all connected on this planet, even if we never know each other.

Another excellent self-creation tool a friend gifted me is a guided journal for tracking my goals. There is something powerful about putting pen to paper and seeing my goals, values, and dream life in ink, which makes them feel more tangible. Writing down my core values was an insightful experience because I could see how my values have changed and deepened over the years, and envision how my values and goals align with my dream life.

“Things don’t always work out the way we hope. You just have to pick yourself up and find a new direction to go in.”

Joelle Charbonneau, author

The Only Way Is Up

Now that I’ve made my way through, it’s time to make my way up.

I knew I had to take action to improve my physical health and mental well-being to accomplish my goals. Finding the right solutions has made a world of difference. I’ve come to understand that struggling is not a catalyst for resilience, and seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness.

No matter where you are on your journey, it’s sometimes necessary to take a breather and check your internal compass to ensure you’re still heading in the right direction.

Last year may have shattered my compass, and this year may have set sail into a storm, but the dark clouds are parting, and I can see blue skies ahead.